I was thinking about how long I yearned to be healed from my insomnia and prayed for it. (Story here) But if I had been right away, I wouldn’t have learned so many beautiful things about being weak and melting into Abba’s strength and pacing myself, prioritizing the more important things in my life over the superficially important ones. And I certainly wouldn’t have been as impacted by the healing had it come soon or gradually.
I think it’s so neat that when it was time, Abba didn’t just up and heal me. He prepared me first. The week leading up to my healing, one of my memory verses was Psalm 4:8–“In peace I lie down and at once fall asleep, for it is you and none other, Yahweh, who make me rest secure.” I went over that verse many times a day until the night before I was healed from insomnia. He even enabled me to have a day filled with prayer and confession the day I met with my spiritual director, and then He used him as a channel of His healing love. Not even just through vague pleading for healing, but by putting a specific word in his heart and encouraging him to pray for it. He helped the situation come exactly together and prompted my spiritual director to pray a specific way because it was time, and somehow, in some way I don’t understand or see, God knew that there was a best way to pray for me and He gave it to my spiritual director. Not only the healing but how to pray for it, because He wants to use him and He wants to use us. That is so beautiful. He could do it on His own if He wanted to, but He didn’t. What a beautiful example of how intimately we can work with God when we are in tune with the Holy Spirit.
The featured painting is by Yongsung Kim.